smackdown

It’s time for SmackDown Live which is sure to be a great show this week. WWE pretty much booked 1/4th of the Money In The Bank pay-per-view all over again in a ploy to get more ratings. Hopefully, this tactic works because WWE certainly has a great show in store.

Opening Segment

Daniel Bryan’s music hit and everyone chanted “yes!” Papa Bryan greeted his fans with his index fingers in the air and entered the ring like always. After some “Daniel Bryan” chants he asked them if they were ready for a great night tonight.

The crowd was ready.

Daniel announced they have two huge women’s matches and hyped the SmackDown Women’s Championship match and a few people cheered. Then he moved on to the Women’s MITB ladder match and people seemed to pay more attention to that.

Suddenly Carmella interrupted Daniel Bryan and came out with her valet James Ellsworth by her side. Carm quoted Bryan saying SmackDown is the land of opportunity but you could hardly hear her because of all the boos she was getting.

She said she was unjustly stripped of the MITB contract and won the ladder match fair and square. She had so much heat from this crowd. She talked about the fact that there are no rules in a MITB ladder match and people hated her.

Mella started listing other people who had outside help to win their MITB matches and pointed out the fact they never had their briefcases taken away. She said she was smarter than any of the “other chicks” in the match and she got some intense heat from the crowd.

Daniel Bryan reiterated the reason why he made his decision and then asked the crowd what they thought. He asked if he should cancel the match and hand the contract back to Carmella and the crowd seemed split, but they certainly made a lot of noise. Then he asked if they should have another MITB ladder match and the crowd went crazy.

There were plenty of “yes” chants and Ellsworth told the crowd to “stop yessing and shut up!” He called the crowd the villains and said they control Daniel who is a stupid puppet. “Ellsworth sucks” chants came from the crowd as James told Daniel he was pathetic.

James said when he looks him he doesn’t see a man, he sees a gutless spineless coward with no grapefruits to cut it in the ring anymore so he made up some hokey injury. Daniel’s beard looked right at James’ no chin for a second and then Bryan said: “Oh James, I could just fire you. But tonight it’s not about you it’s about the real superstars of SmackDown Live.”

Then Daniel banned James Ellsworth from the entire arena and security came out to escort him out. Carmella tried to tell Bryan that he didn’t mean it as the local indie wrestlers in security uniforms dragged James Ellsworth up the ramp. Ellsworth tried to run, but it didn’t work out well for him.

The crowd sang the “na na na goodbye song” because Vince McMahon loves the “na na na song” and Daniel Bryan wished Carmella good luck in the match tonight.

Hype Bros vs The Usos

We don’t get hyped, we stay hyped! You know it, bro! They need to win this non-title match against the SmackDown Tag Team Champions in order to get a real shot at the titles. Even though Hype Bros won a #1 contender match in the first place they still need to earn their spot because SmackDown is always changing.

Ryder started off against Jimmy and lit up the Usos with a few arm drags and a flapjack for a two count. He held Jimmy against the turnbuckle and tagged in Mojo who came in to join the match. Jey eventually got the tag and Mojo said: “he ain’t hype.”

Mojo threw Jey over the top rope and then tossed Zack Ryder over the top rope onto both Usos. Zack tossed Jey back in the ring but caught a kick to the face while getting back in the ring.

While Zack laid on the mat selling his injuries Jimmy Uso got the tag and he jumped down to hammer away at him on the outside. He tossed Ryder in the ring and the Usos made him feel some more punishment. Ryder was draped over the middle rope while he had the life squashed out of him.

Jey latched on a headlock and kept Zack down on the canvas. Ryder was able to cause some separation and crawled toward his partner and got the tag to Mojo.

Rawley jumped in the ring and started to light up the Usos. Jimmy jumped in and broke up a pinning attempt but Mojo returned it by hitting a shoulder tackle that sent his opponent across the ring.

Ryder got the tag and he was able to move out of the way to dodge a splash in the corner. Ryder tried to hit a browski boot, but Jey moved Jimmy out of the way. Jimmy jumped to the top rope and hit a splash for the win.

Well, that was disappointing for the Hype Bros.

Sudden The New Day came down in their new t-shirts and Xavier Woods called Usos honey and said he’s proud of them for finishing a match without walking away from the match.

Big E said they’re coming for them at Battleground. The Usos said they don’t deserve a shot. But they accepted their challenge anyway.

It’s not about New Day anymore, “it’s about Day One Ish.”

Woods said they forgot who they’re messing with because all New Day does is spit hot fire. Kofi grabbed the microphone and started rapping like the Dr. Of Bootynomics.

Then The New Day started dancing and Xavier played some notes on Francesca II to end the segment.

Fashion Vice

Fandango and Tyler Breeze were at it again and this time they were interrogating the Ascension. These bits are amazing and seriously just keeps getting better every week. One of the best parts was the fact they had an 8×10 of the Big Boss Man hanging on the wall behind them.

Dango offered them Eddie Money tickets to spill the beans. Then Breeze tried to intimidate them with water guns. They offered them iced tea and a cheese platter. The Ascension said the only reason they were at Money In The Bank is that they wanted a match on the card.

Suddenly Breeze and Dango heard a noise and returned to their office where it was wrecked again. It looks like it wasn’t the Ascension after all, but they still took their Eddie Money tickets.

Naomi vs Lana

Well, it looks like this match won’t be ending with someone cashing in a MITB contract after all because it went on before anyone had the briefcase.

Lana jumped Naomi before the bell rang and kicked Naomi down in the corner. The ref had to pry Lana off of The Glow and was extra careful before calling for the bell to start the match.

Lana jumped her in a big way and hit her finisher right off the bat. 1-2-and Naomi pushed off of her hard to break up the pin. Naomi took Lana down and immediately hit a split-legged moonsault on Lana.

1-2-3 and Naomi wins in definitive fashion.

With this match going so short the women’s Money In The Bank ladder match looked like it was getting even more time. Lana threw a temper tantrum in the ring while Naomi celebrated up the ramp.

Backstage Segment

Becky Lynch was interviewed about Naomi still being the SmackDown Women’s Champion and Lynch replied she was inches away from winning two weeks ago but Ellsworth ripped it away from her. She said thankfully she has a fair chance and a fair chance is all she needs to be the first women to ever legitimately win the MITB match.

Randy Orton Meets Aiden English

English was in the ring with a spotlight on him while singing about how he is amazing in operatic fashion. People were booing English pretty intensely when suddenly Randy Orton’s entrance song hit out of nowhere and The Viper came out to stop the music.

After a little bit of business, Randy hit an RKO and sent English packing

Randy put a chair in the middle of the ring and said he’s not leaving the ring until he gets what he wants. “Apparently I haven’t made myself clear enough,” Orton said. He said he tore into Jinder Mahal last week with a little bit of this and a little bit of that.

Orton said he wanted another rematch for the WWE Title. He said if he doesn’t get what he wants he’s going to go back and find Jinder Mahal and beat the holy hell out of him. He said he’s gonna keep beating the hell out of him until he gets what he wants. He never really explained why he deserved another rematch, he just said he’s going to keep kicking Jinder Mahal’s ass unil he gets what he wants.

Randy started to go backstage when Shane McMahon came out to stop him. McMahon gave plenty of high fives on his way to the ring to let people know what a rich person’s touch feels like. Then he grabbed a microphone and let the “Shane-O Mac” chants ring out.

Shane said they can’t afford to have Randy go off and threaten the safety out of the WWE Champion. Randy asked if Shane was going to fire him because he’ll just buy a ticket to every show Jinder’s at and beat him up no matter if he gets arrested.

Jinder insulted Randy’s family and he wanted another title shot. Shane brought up the fact that Randy has used similar tactics that Jinder used in the past to keep his title before.

Then Shane granted him a rematch at Battleground. However there is a stipulation and Jinder Mahal will get to chose that stipulation.

“I don’t give a damn what the stip is” Randy replied, “the title’s coming home where it belongs.”

Then the Modern Day Maharaja came out with the Singh Brothers following close behind. Jinder stood proud and powerful as India’s hero and said this is what is wrong with SmackDown Live and everyone else in the arena. He called Orton a snake and unworthy of a rematch.

He started to speak in Punjab in the middle of his promo and got some “USA” chants from the crowd. He said this biased is why he’s making the stipulation of the match at Battleground a Punjabi Prison Match.

Yup, they’re really doing it. It’s actually happening again.

Backstage Segment

Daniel Bryan was backstage talking to someone on the cell phone about how they haven’t had a Punjabi Prison Match in ten years. Then AJ Styles popped in to say hi. He wanted some of Kevin Owens and his open challenge.

Kevin Owens showed up and said he’s already beat AJ so that makes him a loser and he needs to accept it. Then AJ said KO is Ron Burgandy’s definition of San Diego… yup, Kevin Owens is a whale’s vagina. You stay classy, AJ Styles.

Daniel Bryan said they’re going to have an Independence Day battle royal next week and the winner gets to face Kevin Owens for the United States Title at Battleground. Well, that escalated quickly.

Sami Zayn vs Baron Corbin

Mike and Maria Kanellis came out and started to introduce themselves. Suddenly Sami Zayn’s music hit and he busted out in-between them. He motioned that he didn’t mean to break up their party but he had work to do.

Baron Corbin came out with his MITB Briefcase in tow and held up his precious luggage looking as tough as he could. Zayn caught Corbin with a spinning head scissors takedown early on and transitioned it to mounting Baron on the turnbuckle as he rained down punches on his head.

Corbin retreated out of the ring and Sami looked to leap on him but Corbin wisely got out of the way. Sami jumped on Corbin on the other side, but Baron caught him and launched him into the barricade.

The Lone Wolf hit Sami a couple more times and tossed him in the ring. He stood over a beaten Zayn and pushed him against the turnbuckle. He threw Sami into the opposite side of the ring and Sami violently bounced off the turnbuckle.

Baron tried to throw Sami out of the ring, but he held on and hit a forearm from the apron. Zayn smashed Baron against the turnbuckle and went for a springboard move but Corbin knocked him out of the air with a right hand.

The Lone Wolf applied a bearhug and wrenched at Sami while he tried to break up the hold. Baron ran Sami into the turnbuckle and went running at him but Zayn threw up a boot. Corbin took advantage with a clothesline and got a two count.

Then Baron decided to hug Sami some more. Zayn fought out but took a forearm to the lower back. Zayn shot off the ropes and came back with a clothesline that took Baron down.

Then they started to trade some strikes and Baron did the spot where he runs around the turnbuckle and comes back in. Zayn hit a crossbody for a two count and Baron looked a bit weary.

Zayn tried to suplex Corbin as the camera shot to Shinsuke Nakamura who was watching the match on a monitor backstage. Baron hit a stiff shot and two clotheslines in the corner but Zayn moved out of the way of the third and got a two count.

Baron dumped Zayn in the turnbuckle again and placed him on the top rope. They teased a superplex but Sami knocked him off with a headbutt. Sami jumped over Corbin and turned around to run right into an End Of Day. 1-2-3 and Mr. Money In The Bank won.

Baron yelled “all day” as he celebrated his win.

Backstage Segment

Shinsuke Nakamura was asked about The Lone Wolf and he replied by saying Baron Corbin is dangerous but is still afraid of Nakamura and he’s right to be afraid. Nakamura’s a man of few words because he does most of his talking with his knees in the ring after all.

Charlotte Flair vs Carmella va Natalya vs Tamina vs Becky Lynch (2nd-Ever Women’s Money In The Bank Ladder Match)

Everyone got shorter entrances except for Becky Lynch and Carmella for some reason. Everyone looked ready to go but Carmella looked especially pissed off.

All of the women paired off leaving Carmella by herself. She went to get a ladder right off the bat and set it up under the briefcase. She started to climb but suddenly everyone else came in and circled her. They pulled her down and kicked her to the floor.

Tamina started to climb but got pulled down. The ladder fell and Charlotte and Nattie went to hit a double suplex on Becky but she landed on her feet and hit them both with Becksploder Suplexes. Becky then went to set up the ladder and climb up. She had some trouble so Tamina smashed her face off the ladder and hit a Samoan Drop.

Tamina climbed to the top rope and hit the best splash she could muster. It was no Superfly, but it was still a Snuka doing it.

It was like that Drowning Pool song because all of the bodies were hitting the floor. Charlotte and Nattie fought on the inside when Neidhart hit a suplex on Flair. Carmella pulled Nattie out of the ring and went to kick Tamina, but Snuka grabbed her foot. Tamina sent Carm flying over the announce table taking her out.

Charlotte threw Nattie out of the ring and Becky caught her to hit another Becksploder Suplex on the outside. Suddenly it was Char Char and Tamina in the ring fighting for the ladder.

Charlotte grabbed the ladder and Tamina started to pull it from her. Becky climbed up the ladder as they held is and they dropped it on the ropes as Becky landed without doing much damage to herself. But Tamnia took care of that by kicking her in the face.

Charlotte kicked the ladder which sent it through Tamina and Nattie hit Charlotte with a discus clothesline. Nattie propped the ladder the in the corner to trap Charlotte in the corner.

Nattie set up her own ladder and started to climb up to the briefcase. Suddenly Charlotte woke up and grabbed her ladder to prop it against Nattie’s ladder and climbed up to the top.

Charlotte had ahold of the briefcase’s handle, but Nattie punched her off. Suddenly Carmella jumped in the ring and knocked the ladder down sending the both to the mat. Becky came in and hit Carm with a Becksploder Suplex and tried to throw a ladder at Nattie but it missed.

Tamina speared Becky Lynch as “this is awesome” chants started to ring out.

As the briefcase hung high above the ring all five women fought on for the chance to grab it. Nattie set up a ladder and started to climb all alone in the ring.

She took some time setting up her ladder and nobody was around to stop her, but Charlotte jumped in the ring and started to climb up the ladder on Nattie’s side. Becky climbed up the other side and Tamina joined Becky.

All four of these women were vying for the briefcase when the ladder gave way and fell sending all four of them crashing to the mat. Then Carmella came in the ring and quickly set up the ladder again. She climbed up the ladder and started to fiddle with the briefcase. Suddenly all four women picked up Carmella’s ladder and moved her so she couldn’t get to the briefcase. That was a clever spot.

Carmella hit Nattie and Becky with a cross body off the top of the ladder and the crowd broke out into a “holy sh-t” chant. With everyone else down, Charlotte crawled in the ring and decided to give it a try. She hit Tamina with a ladder and pinned her underneath the end of the ladder.

Charlotte started to climb but she was stopped by Carmella. Finally Carm was able to squeeze inbetween Char Char and the ladder as Tamina tipped the ladder over from the ground.

Tamnia hit Charlotte with a superkick that knocked the second generation superstar out. Tamina set up the ladder with care and started to climb. Suddenly Nattie and Becky came back in the ring to stop her. They hammered away at Snuka and plucked her off to execute a double powerbomb on her.

Nattie then scooped up Becky and hit her own powerbomb on the Lass Kicker. Nattie then turned her attention to Carmella and slapped on a sharpshooter but Charlotte kicked Nattie in the head and hit a Natural selection. It doesn’t make much sense to break up the sharpshooter, but oh well.

Then Nattie and Charlotte took each other out of the ring and started to fight through the crowd.

Suddenly James Ellsworth jumped over the barricade and pulled Carmella in the ring. He set up the ladder and started to climb up to get the briefcase as Carm sat on the mat waiting to have the briefcase dropped to her again.

Suddenly Becky Lynch jumped in the ring and kicked Carm in the head and tipped over the ladder sending James Ellsworth plummeting to the mat.

Becky Lynch started to climb the ladder, but Mella grabbed her and pulled her to the mat. It looked like Becky hurt her knee, but she returned to climb the ladder again.

Suddenly Carmella grabbed a chair and whacked Becky off the ladder. After another chair shot to Lynch, Mella climbed back up the ladder and reclaimed her Money In The Bank briefcase.

Carmella won the 1st and the 2nd-ever Women’s Money In The Bank ladder match. Each time she won like a true heel, but at least she won it on her own the second time and that’s all that matters.