Dolph Ziggler Gets A Huge Win, Shane McMahon Makes A Big Announcement, WWE SmackDown Results 5/30/17

It’s SmackDown Live time. Shinsuke Nakamura is set to invade Kevin Owens’ Highlight Reel, there was also a match to determine the #1 contender for the SmackDown Women’s Title too. It’s sure to be a night full of great action as Money In The Bank looms even closer.

Opening Segment

Charlotte was shown talking about how she’s genetically superior, Carmella said she’s got so much class we should call her the teacher, Natalya told us she’s going to prove she’s the best there is etc, Becky Lynch said she doesn’t need the luck of the Irish to win, and Tamina said it’s Tamina’s time. It’s time for someone to become the #1 contender for the SmackDown Women’s Title. My money was on Carmella since Jinder Mahal ended up on top out of nowhere. Plus, she’s had a few victories over Naomi recently anyway.

Kevin Owens was announced and he was already in the ring for a Highlight Reel. Just love how he straight up stole Chris Jericho’s show. Those two are going to feud so hard once Y2J comes back.

Kevin got some major heat by calling himself the New Face Of America. He started his promo off by talking some trash about Jericho while the crowd chanted for AJ Styles.

The New Face Of America said he’s going to do what Jericho was never able to do: win a MITB ladder match. He said once he wins the ladder match he will not only be the New Face Of America, he will also be the face of the entire WWE.

Then Owens introduced one of the people he’s going to step on at MITB (according to him): Shinsuke Nakamura. The King Of Strong Style came out to his seizure-inducing entrance. WWE also added some pyro too, that was kind of unnecessary. At this point, pyro would just take away from Nakamura’s entrance.

Everyone in the building was in love with Nakamura’s entrance, but Owens didn’t look impressed. Owens interrupted the audience while they were chanting his song. Owens said this isn’t America’s Got Talent, there is no room for rock stars, and Nakamura has Owens to deal with.

Owens said he sent Jericho and his stupid little scarf packing and if Nakamura shows up at MITB then it will be the last time anyone gets to sing his stupid song. Owens said that will be the day the music dies.

Baron Corbin came out and told nobody cared what Nakamura had to say. He said “this is a highlight show, right? How about we show some real highlights from a real superstar?” Then they showed the footage of Corbin mugging Sami Zayn after their match last week.

Owens dogged Corbin out for interrupting his show for bragging about beating up Sami Zayn because Kevin’s been doing it for 15 years. Baron Corbin called Kevin Owens “Cartman.” Baron said he’ll become Mr. Money In The Bank.

Nakamura then started talking and everyone wanted to hear what he had to say. He said Y2J isn’t the last rock star Kevin has messed with because last week Shinsuke beat him. He also reminded Baron Corbin that last week he was beat by Zayn.

Then a triangle of pain ensued. Everyone beat Nakamura down until Sami Zayn came in from the crowd and took out Corbin and Owens fled as well. Neither heel looked happy as Owens banged on the announce table and Corbin asked Zayn, “you want another ambulance ride buddy?”

Sami said his and Baron’s fight is far from over and his fight with Kevin will never be over. Then Zayn proposed a tag match to start immediately.

Kevin Owens and Baron Corbin vs Sami Zayn and Shinsuke Nakamura

Remember when Nakamura and Sami Zayn had that awesome match at NXT TakeOver: Dallas? Yup, so do we. Now they’re tagging with each other and the match has even more of a chance to be outstanding.

Baron Corbin and Nakamura started the match out. For some reason, Nakamura didn’t immediately knee The Lone Wolf in the skull and end the match.

Nakamura did light up Corbin with some knees and leg strikes eventually. He executed his Good Vibrations on him in the corner and Baron eventually got the tag.

Sami got the tag and him and Kevin started going at it. Sami chased Kevin around the ring, and Owens jumped on him when he rolled inside. Baron Corbin got the tag, but Zayn turned it around on The Lone Wolf. He belted Corbin with punches in the corner but couldn’t muscle him up for a suplex. Owens hit a cheap shot to the back of Zayn’s head and got the tag.

Corbin came back in and placed Zayn on the top turnbuckle. Sami tried to execute a tornado DDT, but Baron powered through it and used Zayn’s momentum against him to drive him into the mat.

They moved the action to the outside and Baron used the barricade as a weapon against Sami. When they moved back to the ring Zayn was selling his injured back as Baron kept up the abuse on The Underdog From The Underground.

Kevin got the tag and started to treat Sami like a crash test dummy. He hit a senton on Zayn and slapped on a headlock to weaken his opponent. He backed Sami against the turnbuckle and Corbin hit him with an elbow to the head while the ref wasn’t looking.

Owens put on another headlock and Zayn started to Hulk himself up. But he was chopped back down. Kevin applied another headlock and talked some trash as he refused to let up his hold. “Ole” chants started to fill the arena as Sami countered out of the headlock with a Blue Thunder Bomb.

Baron Corbin got the tag first though and he sprinted across the ring to take Nakamura down. Sami rolled him up for a two count.

Baron landed a punishing spinebuster slam to Zayne for his own two count. Sami looked hurt as Nakamura climbed back to the apron. But it didn’t do the babyfaces much good because Corbin kept up the abuse.

Then Zayn hit a clothesline out of nowhere that sent Baron Corbin the mat. Nakamura got the tag as Kevin Owens got his own tag and The King Of Artist Style started doing his thing. He hit Owens with a knee to the midsection while he was draped over the top turnbuckle for a two count.

Owens tried to get some offense in on Shinsuke, but Nakamura landed a kick to the head for another two count. Baron got involved but Sami took him out and laid down some punishment.

Sami sent Owens into Corbin and the two heel partners started arguing. Sami clotheslined Baron over the top rope and Nakamura hit a Kinshasa on Kevin Owens for the win. The babyfaces walked away victorious as Shinsuke Nakamura’s music played on.

Guess Who’s Back?

The Usos were out to make the crowd hate them and they did a great job. They started playing in a great way. They said started talking some trash about the teams that couldn’t beat them. Then they hit the Atlanta crowd the to core by bringing up the Super Bowl and how the Falcons lost to the Patriots.

All of a sudden… “Don’t you dare be sour!” It’s a New Day, yes it is! All three members of the longest running WWE Tag Team Champions ever came down to announce that our boys were indeed back!

Xavier Woods said that since they’re on SD Live, they couldn’t think of a better place to debut than his hometown of Atlanta, GA. Kofi said they brought these world-class hips — and The Usos interrupted them.

They asked if they just skipped down the Yellow Brick Road or something, and Kofi said it’s more like a skip, skip, clap.

The Usos said they had the titles on lock. Big E said they like they SmackDown Tag Team Titles and they wants them. Woods said they can do it the easy way or the hard way, but in the end they’re getting those titles.

Usos said they were going to take the three unicorns out back and take care of it Old Yeller style. Woods called the Usos honey and said they know the guy who actually runs the show.

Xavier said they have some special opponents at MITB but he can’t remember who (insert who chants here). Then they announced it would be Usos vs New Day at Money In The Bank for those nifty blue tag titles. Neat! It’s just a shame that Breezango seem to be out of the title picture at this point. They were gold.

The Fashion Files Continues!

They’re back and Breezango hasn’t lost a step. They did a Fashion Files segment in the vein of an old black and white detective movie, complete with a sexy silhouette that turned out to be Tyler Breeze.

It was hilarious and took their characters to a whole new level. They’re amazing. Officer Dango and the master of disguise Tyler Breeze were outstanding while they tried to determine what was stinking on SmackDown Live.

Their one-liners were great and they delivered the lines with precision. They said that they had found their next case. Let’s hope it’s a fun one!

Charlotte vs Becky Lynch vs Carmella vs Natalya vs Tamina (#1 Contenders Match for the SmackDown Women’s Title)

It’s time to figure out who will scramble for the SmackDown Women’s Championship at Money In The bank. Each lady came to fight and Carmella even brought James Ellsworth for emotional support. He also makes a great diversion on the outside. Is he just managing her at this point?

When Becky Lynch hit the ring she was ready to go. She got right up in the heel’s faces and a riot soon ensued. The ref never got the chance to ring the bell to start the match because everything just kept up. I smell a women’s MITB match coming.

All of them were beating each other without any sense of control and the referee started waving everyone off. Becky took it to Carmella on the outside as Tamina and Charlotte battled in the ring. Becky Lynch hit a sweet elbow over the barricade. The ref looked blown up at that point trying to stop these ladies.

Tamina Snuka deconstructed an announce table and cleared it off. She grabbed Charlotte, but The Nature Girl slammed her against the apron and post of the ring. Nattie ran up to Char Char and she got planted with a slam on the outside.

Then Charlotte climbed to the top of the turnbuckle and landed an amazing moonsault. Carmella hit Charlotte with a splash from the timekeepers’ area. Becky snatched Carm up and hit her with an exploder suplex on the outside. It was all absolute carnage.

The referees began to multiply but the action kept going on. Nattie tried to powerbomb Char through the announce table, but she threw The Queen Of Harts into the ring steps. Then Charlotte picked Nattie up and powerbombed her through the announce table. It broke like it’s supposed to. We’re assuming that was a gimmicked table because those things aren’t breaking with an RKO anymore usually.

Insert Shane McMahon here. Every lady, including James Ellsworth laid around the ring looking battered and brutal. Shane said the SmackDown women’s division is on fire. But everyone was too amped up for the match to even begin.

Then McMahon announced something historic and announced the first ever women’s Money In The Bank Ladder Match. It’s finally happening. Yay for everybody! It’s about time. But it’s a great thing they’re doing it now because if they did it a couple of years ago the briefcase would probably have a butterfly on it.

Breezango vs The Colons

So the former bullfighters are the new Uggos? That’ll work. We’ll take anything at this point because Breezango is so awesome at least they’re still on television. Breeze was wearing a dress and a wig that he refused to take off when the bell rang. This is going to make great highlight footage during his WWE Hall Of Fame induction someday.

He got his dress ripped off immediately and that drew a lot of heat. Fandango got the tag and he was still wearing his trench coat. Someone needs to make a created wrestler on 2K17 of Dango in a trench coat STAT.

Then Breezango threw both former Shining Stars over the top rope. The Colons wasted some time on the outside to give Breezango time to be awesome in the ring. Once they got in the ring Fandango maintained control with some chops to the corner. But he was tripped up by the other Colon and driven into the apron. Now with Dango damaged, the Colons took control of the match.

The Colons utilized some tandem tag team offense to keep Fandango down. He fought to get out of a submission hold, but Dando was driven to the mat. The Colons hit a double elbow drop and got a two count out of it.

The Colons were in command, but Dango soon rolled his foe up in a roll up for a two count. Epico jumped on Tyler Breeze and hit him off the apron. Then Epico hit a backbreaker for a two count. Now even if Dango got to his feet, Breeze wasn’t there to tag. Dango threw up a knee and hit Primo. He crawled to his partner but he was still on the floor.

Epico got a two count on Fandango as The Colons continued their tandem offense. Dango revered a top rope move and turned it into a sunset flip powerbomb. Suddenly we figure out why Breeze was gone so long because he appeared as the janitor again complete with bald cap and moustache. Dango wouldn’t let The Colons get to Breeze’s mop and Tyler hit an Unprettier for the win.

Backstage Interview

Renee Young asked AJ Styles what it was like to be in Atlanta. Styles talked about how he was going to win at MITB and Dolph so rudely interrupted to remind everyone that he’s the one in the match who has won a MITB ladder match before. Ziggler asked if he wanted to have their match now and AJ Styles took off his shirt. “Let’s go, that’s how we do it in the A-T-L” Styles said.

Ziggler just smirked at him and walked away.

Randy Orton Speaks

The Viper’s music hit and everyone rose to their feet. Orton seemed to have it all together, even though he didn’t have his WWE Championship. He looked comfortable in his RKO hoodie as he grabbed the microphone and prepared to speak.

He said “in case you’ve been living under a rock for 17 years I’m Randy Orton.” He said the wrestling business was in his blood. If his grandfather was alive today he would slap the hell out of him for losing the title to Jinder Mahal.

He said he’s not going to tell us how he’s going to go and get his title back at MITB, he’s just going to do it. Randy said Mahal hasn’t earned anyone’s respect and the only thing he deserves is a good old fashioned Orton family ass kicking.

He said MITB is in his hometown and winning is the only option. Then Randy said he’s going to take a cue from his grandfather and stop talking. He said he’ll become the champion at MITB for the 14th time.

Then the Maharaja’s music hit, but he didn’t appear in the building. Instead, Jinder was on the big screen to talk up a bit. Mahal said Orton tells stories while his country is in decay. He’s a symbol of the US holding onto the past and not the future. Then Mahal told him to behold his new WWE Champion, Jinder Mahal.

The Singh Brothers appeared on either side of him and clapped very loudly while they had an Indian flag behind them. Randy just turned and kept on posing while his music hit once again. They found a tight crowd shot of a dude wearing an American flag shirt pointing while he was like “yeah buddy!” That was probably edited in.

Dolph Ziggler vs AJ Styles

Well, AJ Styles got an amazing ovation from the Atlanta GA crowd, that’s for sure. JBL said everybody wants to beat a guy in their hometown and that’s exactly what Dolph wanted to do in Hotlanta.

AJ was in all red for his Georgia Bulldogs and the blue Money In The Bank Briefcase hung above the ring.

“AJ Styles” chants filled the arena as The Phenomenal One took control of the match early on. Ziggler threw AJ against the turnbuckle and Styles slid under the bottom rope and took the steel ring post to the ribs. He looked hurt and they went to commercial. For some reason they’re not doing the picture-in-picture deal during the main event of the show.

Dolph and AJ moved the action back to the ring. Dolph got a headlock in until AJ Styles broke it up with a nice suplex. Both men laid on the mat and sold their injuries as the got to their feet at the same time.

Styles punched Ziggler a few times and delivered a few kicks and a clothesline. He hit a jumping clothesline in the corner and slid in with a forearm to Dolph’s face. Two count and Ziggler kicked out.

AJ Styles set up for the Styles Clash, but couldn’t pull it off. Dolph pinned AJ using the ropes, but the ref noticed his feet. AJ Styles hit a fireman’s carry neckbreaker and got a close two-count. AJ Styles tried to hit another Styles Clash, but Ziggler fought it off and got to the ropes. They fought for position on the apron, but AJ sent Ziggler into the turnbuckle. That spot looked like it hurt.

Both men were spend and AJ Styles was too tired to even get a cover. AJ positioned himself on the turnbuckle above Ziggler and got him up for a Top Rope Styles Clash, but Dolph squirmed out of it and hit AJ with a top rope Ziggler-style DDT instead.

Dolph hit a kick and tried for a Fameasser, but Styles turned it into a Styles Clash that was broken up brefore it could land. Ziggler hit AJ with a punch and then Styles hit a backbreaker on Dolph. Nobody tried for a pin, they just tried to get to their feet.

As soon as they were up, AJ hit Ziggler with a knee to the side of the head.

Dolph soon had AJ Styles up on the top turnbuckle looking for a superplex. But AJ slipped out of it and sent Dolph to the turnbuckle. The two traded some reversals until Ziggler was locked in a Calf Crusher from AJ.

Dolph got out of the move thanks to a thumb to the eye. AJ walked up to Dolph and kicked him but received a Zig Zag in return. 1-2-kickout!

Dolph went for a superkick but his knee gave out. The Calf Crusher was doing its job. AJ went for a Phenomenal Forearm, but Dolph knocked AJ Styles down. Dolph finally landed a superkick and got the clean win.

It’s like the old saying goes: “Nobody wins in their hometown when you’re in WWE.”